Have you ever just thought to yourself, “boy, I would love to have my house to myself for a week?” Oh, come on, sure you have! We raised a brood of kids, have a retired spouse, entertain your grandkids and friends, but never have your house to yourself. If this isn’t you, you might not want to finish reading this blog. If this is you, it may make you feel better to know that you are not alone! According to a study published by the Mather Institute, there are two motivators for solitude: 

1. Positive motivations for solitude – characterized by an intrinsic desire to spend time alone for reflection, restoration, or personal interests. 

1. Negative motivations for solitude – characterized by choosing to be alone for more protective reasons, such as avoiding social discomfort and feelings of exclusion 

In this study, senior living residents completed a survey that measured positive and negative motivations for solitude. This study found that solitude seekers had the highest positive motivations for solitude and below average negative motivations, which suggests they are primarily motivated to spend time alone because they enjoy it! 

Based on the study findings, here are a few of the recommendations on ways to support well-being among residents who prefer to spend more time alone: 

• Inquire about preferences related to social engagements. When residents join your community, ask them about their preferred levels and types of social involvement and adapt recommendations for community involvement accordingly. 
• Create an inclusive and welcoming atmosphere. Some residents may choose to spend more time alone when they feel like they don’t fit in, or if they worry about being excluded by cliques. Facilitate introductions between residents with similar interests and social preferences. 
• Offer comfortable options for solo dining. While some residents enjoy meals as a social event, others prefer a simpler experience, at least some of the time. Arranging dinner companions and making small talk can be draining when alone time is preferred. 

There are many more ideas shared in this study, please click the link below to access the complete report. One take away is that just because someone wants solitude doesn’t mean they are lonely. In fact, quite the opposite, those who were allowed space to have solitude time were better adjusted and socially active when they chose to be. Remember, we are all individuals with individual needs and wants. Don’t try to put a square peg in a round hole! Stay informed and stay well! 

Seeking Solitude: Motivations for “Alone Time” among Senior Living Residents